Why do you listen?

There is no such thing called bad listener

Photo by CoWomen on Unsplash

Once I was volunteering a friend who needed a therapy client for his assignment. He was a psychology student and for his assignment, he needed someone who can act as a client as you would do in a normal therapy session.

I stepped up to the task and he started asking questions regarding my childhood, my family, my profession, and I happily answered all of them.

Then every time I finished my answer, he recited it back verbatim, while adding “ok this is what I’m hearing” before every recitation. At first, I thought “okay cool, he’s trying to make sure that he’s not misunderstanding my words”. But as he kept on reciting all my responses i started feeling a mixuture of amusement and slight irritation.

Well, I knew what he was doing. He was applying a psychology technique called, “reflective listening” It’s a listening technique used to reassure the clients that there feelings are being understood.

Looking at this now, I find this whole instance very hilarious. Because he seemed much more interested in applying his listening technique rather than actually listening to me.

I get it, the technique has its uses, but there is a point I am trying to make: that most listening prescription ( Do’s and don’ts ) and techniques…